It has been a while since I have written, partially because I have been trying to adjust to all our life changes. I am happy to report that we made it through our first quarter of PA School and have begun the second. I wanted to share how my husband and I made things work in the hopes that I’m an help someone else on their journey through school or work with a loved one.
My expectation going into school was that I would never see my husband, that he would either be studying or at school 99.9% of his time. (This was actually nice for me because I felt like I saw him all the time lol) Once he got a hold on things he was actually able to do a lot more than I expected. Here is what we planned out. He leaves for school every day at 8 am (even most Saturdays) even if he doesn’t have a class that early, this gives him extra time to study and meet with classmates. He always comes home at 6pm no matter when classes end that day to further study. This allows him to come home and spend time with Ryker and I, we always have dinner as a family which has really kept our bond alive. Occasionally he will come home early, mostly on a Saturday to have some more time as a family or to go to events. I think this system has worked out so well because we scheduled it like a work day. There is hope everyone! Find what fits your family the best and stick to it.
The other rough thing about full time school is the financial situation. Our whole marriage we have had two incomes, so going down to barely one has been a huge adjustment for us. I decided that I needed a job where I could take Ryker with me because the cost of childcare can be so high. It was really hard for me to find happiness doing this. I tried nannying with a sweet family but the drive and hours were becoming difficult for me to handle. I tried starting an in home preschool which has already fizzled out. (Hopefully it will pick up next year) Now I am on to other things that are in the works and I will tell you all about once they are finalized. The best way to budget that we have worked out is to talk to each other. Every night Bobby and I dedicate any where from 10-20 minutes to talk about finances and scheduling for the next day. This has been a huge lifesaver for us, we both feel more in the know and we don’t have to hide any purchases. Talk to your husbands ladies! It’s so so important!
Lastly, MAKE FRIENDS! If you have kids, or even if you don’t! Friends will help you through it all. We are so blessed to be surrounded by a huge dental school where a bunch of wives and kids are in the same situation as us. Reach out, do what you have to so to not be alone all the time. It will really wear you down if you don’t have some adult interactions.. It has been a huge life saver for me to know that I have so many women around me that can support me and understand my situation. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there, this is actually really hard for me to do, so if I can do it then so can you!
I hope that I am able to help some of you, our system isn’t perfect.. but it works for us. Some days seem way longer than others, that is when it is nice to get out and explore or talk with family! Life becomes consumed with studying and tests, but looking at the big picture it is worth every second!
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